I just want to set the record straight. I am not writing this for pity or attention. I am writing this with the anticipation of helping someone that might be struggling with a cronic illness. I was diagnosed with Meniere's disease 22 years ago. I literally thought I was going to die. I thought I had a brain tumor, but fast forward ahead, I was finally diagnosed with MD. I have lost all hearing in my right ear and have only 64% word recognition. With that being said it is a struggle within itself everyday just to understand what is being said and trying to understand what people are saying. I battled this for several years and I had small children and life became very difficult during this time, but God was there with me the whole time. Then it was like it just went to sleep. I did not have any trouble with it although I still had the deafness, but I was learning how to deal with it. Life was good and then out of nowhere, the sleeping giant woke up again. Needless to say I was very discouraged but was dealing with it. It became so severe that I decided to have a procedure done to put gentamiacin drops in my hear to kill the nerve. I had an allergic reaction and have suffered from continuous balance issues. I am not free from this disease but know that God is in control. I am starting to change my diet and to try to get a handle on this giant. If you have ever been deep sea fishing and become seasick, that is what this disease feels like. You never know when it is going to hit you and when it does, you are at the mercy of the world. That is why i do not go many places by myself. I refuse to let this disease win, but I am learning how to cope. Yes, there are many things that I am inhibited from doing, but I am learning to take it one day at a time. I wake up every morning and this is what I say, ok God it's me and You today, please help me and help me bring your name glory. Do I always succeed at this? NO, but I strive to live my life pleasing to Him. I am not sure what my lesson is in all of this, but until God chooses to heal me, I will take it with thankfulness. Do I always feel like giving thanks? NO Lets be real, this disease sucks, but it could be worse. I have decided that I will do my part to bring healing to my body by taking better care of myself and eating right. So I guess my posting this article is the start of my healing. I only want your prayers as I navigate my way through this journey. Yes it is a bumpy road, but I know God is right here holding my hand. You may be on a similar bumpy road, but know that God is right near holding your hand. It is a walk of faith and I know my hope is in the Lord. May you be blessed with Gods provision, health, prosperity and peace of mind. I will post regularly of my disease and my feelings and emotions of going through this disease.
Boy has it been a long week. It is Friday night and I am home enjoying making soap and sewing all at the same time. I find myself enjoying staying home more and more. I guess because I have so much I like to do at home. For so many years it was a constant on the go with our boys and their activities, don't get me wrong I loved every minute of it. But we have started a new chapter in our lives and that is life without children at home. While I enjoy it sometimes, I miss my boys very very much. I must confess that I had a hard time when they both told me that God had called them into ministry. Church people can be mean, jus sayin. It is a faith walk every day that God will take care of them and keep them safe. I have always been a "fixer", but I have had to take my hands off and let God have control. That is hard sometimes for moms. Don't be afraid to let your kids fly. That is what God created them to do. Dream and become awesome Kingdom workers. So I pray that if you are struggling with letting your children go, take heart God is in control. No it is not easy, and there are many hard days when you miss them very much, but I know that they are where God has called them to be. I don't understand sometimes but I have total faith in my God that HE is in control.
I know it has been a while since my last post and i do apologize. I have been extremely busy since school has started back. I know many of you are curious as to my blog title. Just let me begin by saying that God knows all, sees all and hears all. So take heart. I have been faced with a situation that I just do not understand, but during my prayer time the other day God gave me a peace. I was praying about a particular situation that had me very disturbed and disheartened, but while in prayer God assured me that HE KNOWS ALL, HE SEES ALL AND HE HEARS ALL. So let me encourage you today, take heart our hope is in the Lord. No matter what happens and what disappointments come our way God knows. It is so hard to trust God when you seem to see mistreatment, and people taking advantage of you or your children or whatever, but rest in His peace and know that He sees, He hears and HE KNOWS.
I am sitting hear listening to it pour down rain outside and making Monster Cookies for our Dave Ramsey class tonight. As I was mixing the ingredients together for these cookies I began to make an analogy. If you only take one ingredient it does not make a cookie but if you take several ingredients and blend together it makes a delicious, mouthwatering cookie. I love Monster Cookies, jus sayin. Any way, isn't that just like our God, he takes just little ol me and mixes it with the ingredients of his spirit, such as(love, peace, joy, longsuffering, patience, gentleness, kindness meekness etc.) you get the picture and makes us into something sweet and wonderful for his kingdom. Monster cookies would not be good without the sugar, butter, m&ms, peanut butter, oatmeal etc., My prayer today is that you would just let Jesus mix you all up with some of his ingredients so that you can become "Monster Cookies" for his kingdom. Not literally, but that we would bring about a sweetness to his kingdom and to his work. I for one am having to work on this to let the fruits of his spirit become more evident in my life and that I would live a life that is pleasing to my heavenly father.
I know I have not posted in a while so here I am. School has started back and that means my job as a School Secretary has just gotten extremely busy. I love my job and the people I work with although it is an extremely stressful job. I feel like a huge rubberband some days when I am stretched in 100 different directions. My goal this year is to not take ownership with things I have no control over. I tend to be a perfectionist so I have a bent to take on too much. I think many women are like this but guess what ladies, God did not intend for us to go it alone. I try everyday to keep my heart and mind pointed to the cross. Sometimes the clouds get in the way but the Son always shines. It is my prayer that I let his grace abound through me everyday and learn that there are some mountains that are just not worth dying on. I am at a point in my life where I do not have the pressures of small children running around, but I think so many times we just replace that with other pressures. God has not given us a spirit of fear but of a sound mind and that is what I am working on these days. Just me and God working on keeping my life on a steady pace to the cross. It is not easy some days but I pray I keep striving to live a life that is pleasing to him and having fun in the process.
I have had a great week so far. I am off for five more days. Yea! I have done alot of thinking about my ladies group "Unlimited" and the upcoming bible study. I so want God to do great things in our ladies. I believe we all become so busy that we have little time for relationships outside our family. I want to encourage women to cultivate some relationships with some girlfriends. So many times we feel like we want to stay within our shell like a turtle for fear of getting hurt. Believe me, I just have walked through a place in my life that has shaken my beliefs to the core. BUT, I know that God has it all under control. I will not let Satan win in this area of my life. I intend to be a Lion Chase and quit living like I am wanting to arrive safely at death. I have much life to live and intend to live it with hilarious humor. I love to laugh. You know those belly laughs. They are good for th soul. Let me encourage to laugh. Have a blessed week. Terry
It has been a fun day. I am so thrilled to have ten days off straight. My plans are to craft, craft, craft. I so want to get started with my etsy account, but am scared to death and to be honest, I do not know how to do it. All help would be appreciated. I have come to a time in my life, where I am trying to simplify and get out of debt. I am tired of being a slave to debt. My oldest son got married April 10th and youngest will be getting married March 5, 2011. I am excited for them both but it makes me sad at the same time. If I could go back and parent now, knowing what I know, it would be totally awesome. I miss those little guys running around the house and driving them from ball game to ball game. Oh if I could have a 1.00 for every ball game that I sat through, I would be rich. I cherish those memories. To all you parents out there in the saga of the teenage years, take heart this too shall pass. If I could give you any piece of advice, I would tell you to enjoy the journey and stay the course. Set boundaries and don't budge. There will be times when you just don't like your teenager, but let me tell you that they do grow up and you will like them again. I love my boys and the Men that they have become. Take heart, dig deep and enjoy.